Amanda Pendolino
February 14, 2013

Ikea Encourages Valentine’s Day Sex With Free Crib (In Nine Months)

“On a cold Valentine’s Day in 2013, we heard that we could get a free crib… and that just really got us in the mood.”

Or so will go the conception story told to future children if Australians take Ikea up on its unique V-Day offer.

According to Gizmodo, the furniture retailer has released a coupon offering free cribs to babies born exactly nine months from today, on November 14, 2013. Limit one cot per baby, and the coupon — and proof of birth — must be provided.

Sorry, horny Americans… this deal is only good in Southern and Western Australia.

If Ikea runs out out of cribs, $99 gift cards will be issued. Luckily, you have until December 14, 2013 to redeem the offer — though who wouldn’t love to pop out a baby and then head straight to the exhausting labyrinth that is Ikea? (At least they’ve got cinnamon rolls.)