Man Steals Flowers From Grave Site to Give to Girlfriend
If I’ve learned anything from the media, it’s that dames love flowers almost as much as they love chocolate, wine, and engagement rings.
I don’t know if it’s the sweet smell, the pretty colors, or the fact that for something that wilts and dies pretty quickly, they’re pretty damn expensive – all I know is that getting your girlfriend a bouquet is pretty much a one-way ticket to the top of the Good Boyfriends list.
David James Lee also knows this. The problem is, he doesn’t have any money. So when David wanted to get his girlfriend some flowers, he had to improvise.
Where can one find a near-limitless supply of free flowers? Why, a cemetery, of course.
The Florida Times-Union (yes, of course this happened in Florida) reports that David was arrested in a cemetery last weekend when an officer found him holding three bouquets with “fresh soil falling from them.” According to the officer, David had “ripped them out of the soil next to a tombstone,” and was planning to present them to his girlfriend.
“A” for effort, David. But in the future, please remember (this goes for everyone): getting your girlfriend flowers will get you on the Good Boyfriends list. Getting your girlfriend dead-people flowers will get you thrown in jail.